Lighthousecoaching is a blog on romantic relationships. Posts explore relationships through articles, but also quotes, poems, photos by influential artists, philosophers, researchers, thinkers and writers.

When it's been too long...

When there have been too many years of anxiously wondering if our partner loves us, if we are doing anything right by them, it is sometimes too late: the wounds and the feelings of rejection, and hurt are just too deep to even imagine the possibility of healing.

Sometimes, couples will come too late, after years of isolation and despair, year of unsuccessful attempts at connection, of unsuccessful attempts at proving themselves worthy of their partner's love.

Like a ship that needs to turn around: the larger it is, the harder it is to turn it around, not like a small zodiac…

But it can turn around… when anxious partners start to see how their actions, rather than pulling their partners close, has actually pushed them away further and further; when withdrawing partners starts to see how their need for isolation has done nothing but exacerbate their partner’s insecurities...

How long have you been feeling disconnected from your partner? What do you do when you feel insecure and disconnected? Push? Withdraw?

I don't know when it all started...

It's not about the dishes...